Friday, April 2, 2010

Randomly Delicious & Blogfest: First Pages

Tomorrow is the last day for the The Keep It Going Contest. Post a comment tallying your entries. Add to the story if you have time. There are multiple ways to win. Don't miss out. Act now. Supplies are limited. Wait,what were we talking about? Oh, yea - sorry, I was momentarily possessed by an infomercial. I'm better now.

BLOGFEST!! Yay!!  Kelly over at Kelly's Compositions has come up with a wonderful idea for a blogfest. As she says, in most blogfests we post excerpts from the middle of our novels. This is a great opportunity to start in the beginning.

This is perfect timing, because I've been thinking about beginnings. This week I started a new WIP, a YA paranormal. And as I tweeted last night (FOLLOW ME), I've had to remind myself not to stress about the beginning in the beginning, because I write a better beginning in the end. That's the only nugget of wisdom that I can share today. Beginning a new WIP, always leaves me feeling quite humbled and terrified. It's like a first date. Is this the one? Do I want to spend all my free time with these characters, this plotline? Is there a better one out there for me? Is this the best for me now? But the answer is quite simply, you'll never know unless you try. Tell the voice of doubt to shut the hell up, and write your heart out.

Back to blogfest. I'm pulling this from my finished WIP, Iron Thirst. The novel has two beginnings: prologue and chapter 1. This excerpt is from chapter 1 where we meet Felicity Johnson. Hope you enjoy.

***

-->
Who knew two tiny fangs could be so hard to find? I bought the pair nearly five months ago, and I specifically remember thinking to put them somewhere that I could find them. My room is a complete and utter disaster. I have been through every drawer, emptying the contents onto my bed in search for the last thing needed to complete my costume. I can’t be a vampire without fangs.
            I plop down on the bed, and close my eyes. Where did I put them?
            “Bathroom, second drawer, along with the red contacts,” I say aloud to the ceiling.
             I leap from the bed. Christian will be here any minute, and I want him to see the complete look. I slide open the drawer, and there they sit. I can’t believe I forgot the contacts too. They set me back nearly a hundred bucks.
            I insert the teeth, and begin trying to attach the colored plastic to my eyeballs. I should’ve waited on the eye makeup. I run back to my closet to grab shoes.
Zipping up the knee-high leather boots, I stop by the mirror for one last look. The struggle was well worth it. My eyes glow a bright crimson with black around the edges, as if the fire inside has burnt the curved periphery. I bounce my palm off the spikes of my black pixie wig. The menacing grin is complete with two sharp fangs over my scarlet red lips that look poised to wreak havoc amongst the unsuspecting city of Atlanta.
            Well, the town won’t be that unsuspecting, considering the rest of the people at DragonCon will also be dressed in costumes ranging from Star Trek to Night of the Living Dead.
As I darken the shadows under my eyes to give myself the true undead look, the doorbell rings. I slide down the banister to get to the door--safer than taking the stairs in these boots.
I fling the door open, and there he stands. We both let out a scream and begin cackling at each other. Christian is a yicky-ucky zombie, complete with a tattered, stained, once-white shirt, suspenders, and pants that look as if they had been buried. His normally perfect hair is dirty and a total mess. His skin is painted a weird grayish green, and his mouth is bloodstained. No one would recognize this scary critter as my clean-cut best buddy.
 “Felicity Johnson, you look a-freakin-mazing. I would have never thought that you, of all people, could pull this off.”
I should be offended, but he is quite right. Everyday “me” is not sexy, not scary, and definitely not a vampire.


26 comments:

  1. i liked this. makes me want to dress up for halloween RIGHT NOW.
    Also I, too, write better beginnings after i've done the ending

    ReplyDelete
  2. I always start with the beginning, but ironically, for my upcoming book a prologue was requested, so I did end up writing the beginning last.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I like this a lot. And I really love that last line. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. I understand the fear of starting a new WIP. It's lurking all around me. I have to possibles stories that I want to work one, and don't know which to tackle first.

    I liked your opening here. it certainly pulls a the imagination which is never a bad thing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I REALLY enjoyed this!! I want to read more, and your first line is just perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I find the beginning is the part I always rewrite the most. You've done a great job! And thanks for following!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sounds like Felicity is poised to fly out of her shell. I'm definitely curious to see what trouble she can get into dressed as a vampire in the city of Atlanta!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh yeah. I read this on TPQSP and I got to hand it to you on the rewrite. Very strong.

    I feel the excitement; and her personality comes through very clearly. This is just awesome Aj.

    I know this novel is amazing. I'm so intrigued, I'd drop everything else to read it.

    .........dhole

    ReplyDelete
  9. I really like this! Great implied history (messy room indicating a wild search). I like the voice--very strong--it brings out her personality wonderfully!!
    :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Haha I loved your beginning and your ending to this scene. You can already hear her voice very well, which is so important. Fantastic job =)

    ReplyDelete
  11. I like your excerpt, the writing is very clear, concise, full of voice. I usually have a hard time with beginnings.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I love the characters and the dynamics between them. Great beginning!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Wow! Thanks for everyone! Little overwhelmed. Don't normally get this much response in one day. Feelin' loved. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  14. This is great. I really like it and I think I've read some earlier versions on Public Query Slush Pile

    ReplyDelete
  15. OK. I freaking LOVE THIS. I LOVE that the teeth and eyes aren't real , for starters. I love that she's looking around, and you get a sense of "what's she going to DO?" Home run, Alicia.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Excellent, AJ. I'm totally intrigued. I've always loved to dress up in costume, so these paragraphs pulled me in immediately. In fact I had to go read the blurb for Iron Thirst.

    I'd read this book in a heartbeat, even if I weren't a recent transplant to Atlanta and fascinated by DragonCon - although that's true too.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Great job pulling me into this story. Excellent beginning, Alicia.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I loved your story. This section really stood out as stunning:
    Zipping up the knee-high leather boots, I stop by the mirror for one last look. The struggle was well worth it. My eyes glow a bright crimson with black around the edges, as if the fire inside has burnt the curved periphery. - This first followed by the hunt for lost teeth?
    Then tighten up the boy's description - you have a winner.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Oh, I like this. Loved the last line - way to introduce a character!

    ReplyDelete
  20. She has spirit (or so it seems)! Love it. Thanks for participating- I'd keep reading for sure.

    ReplyDelete
  21. It's almost my bedtime so I skipped the above comments, sorry if I repeat what's been said.

    I really enjoyed this! It flows nicely, is easy to read and picture in my mind. I love your voice. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  22. This is really fun--brings back Halloween memories. Of course, I'm wondering what kind of turn it's going to take!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Love this! Especially the whole not normally sexy thing, sounds like the perfect start:) Now I want to know what the night is going to be like for her as a sexy vampire.

    ReplyDelete
  24. This was super fun to read!! Loved it! I was not bored at all. Which is very cool! Keep on truckin!

    ReplyDelete
  25. You instill a fresh, quirky, lovable personality into your heroine in a few short paragraphs. Excellent.

    Come read my first page and see what you think. Have a surprisingly fun weekend, Roland

    ReplyDelete